Joan's Annual Recipe

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Joan's Annual Recipe

Postby Joan » Tue Dec 24, 2019 5:14 pm

Here's a recipe for your Christmas party:
Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies

1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila

Place your Flyer in your shirt to keep you company while you prepare the cookies.
Stop flyer from sampling the Cuervo to check quality.
Take a large bowl, :multi: this time, you sample the Cuervo to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Turn on the electric mixer.
Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Remove flyer who has decides to "ride" the beater. Scrape butter off flyer and return it to the bowl ... the butter, not the flyer!
Add one peastoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still ok, try another cup just in case. Remove flyer from your glass.
Turn off the mixerer thingy.
Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Remove fruit with a flyer attached.
Pick the frigging fruit off the floor that flyer tossed as he selected "the best" pieces soaked in Cuervo.
Mix on the turner. Fight off flyer who "wants to ride again".
If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaters just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity. Remove flyer from your glass.
Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who geeves a sheet. Check the Jose Cuervo. Remove flyer from your glass. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
Add one table. Glare back at flyer who's eyes are now crossing.
Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find that flyer hasn't spilled all over the floor.
Greash the oven. Return buttered flyer to mixer after greasing oven with him.
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Glare at flyer who is now on his back "riding a bicycle".
Don't forget to beat off the turner. Flyer can no longer hop in a straight line to "get on board".
Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the wishdasher. Return snoring flyer to your bed and crawl in his nest box for a nap.

"A lot of people spend time talking to the Animals, but not that many people listen. That's the real problem! ... Winnie the Pooh
"A lot of people spend time talking to the Animals, but not that many people listen. That's the real problem! ... Winnie the Pooh

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